Jane is 16, or at least she said she was. How much trouble are you in?

So today, we take a break from my experiences in France in favour of something else.

Those of you logging on still expecting to see full frontal female nudity will have to go disappointed a little bit longer, sorry.

Today, we talk about the news, or rather the lack of news we encounter everyday, and its effect on everything from food prices to the law.

This isnt just about my usual complaint that every week people go out and buy magazines about Jordan's new loft extension or Kerry Katona's fat arse, we're talking about sensationalism. The credit crunch is aprime example, as we already know, if people were to continue spending as normal the whole problem would evaporate but news where everything is ok is as much fun as drowning, so we're told that your bank manager has lost all your money down the bookies and as a result we're all going to be homeless and poor forever, accepting work from the new rich in Ethiopia and the Congo for 10p a year.

Further to this is the whole Gary Glitter saga, first off I must point out that Paedophiles do deserve horrible punishment. My suggestion is that they be shot, then crushed, then trampled by wildebeest into dust, then the dust should be fed to dogs, then we should blow up the dogs.

However, as the title of this piece may have suggested, thanks to sensationalism, old Gazza has been hounded to the ends of the earth purely because he used to be famous. Lets take a walk down real street for a second, you probably know someone who, in the eyes of the law at least, has engaged in "inappropriate activity with a child". The law states anyone under 16 is a child, so if, like myself and many of my friends some years ago, you are 16 or 17, with a 15 year old girlfriend, then you my old son are a dirty Paedophile, even if you're not having full sex.

Then we come to the disturbing trend of nightclub doormen taking "favours" to let underage girls in, not widely covered in the news, but we are all well aware it happens. Magazines aimed at teens show them how to look older, and a number of news stories I've read this week have involved underage drinking.

One in particular is another of these house parties arranged on Myspace, to which serval million univited guests turn up and trash the joint, everyone is very angry of course, but the 15 year old girl who organised it and had invited some men old enough to be her dad, just says;
"It was just meant to be a few friends round for a couple of drinks"

The men in question claim they thought the girl was 19, I saw a picture and I could easily believe that, but they get reprimanded by the press, and not the girl who if we're honest shouldn't have been drinking in the first place.

I digress though, back to Mr. G, now his case was different, the kids in question were easily recognisable as kids, but why was such heavyhanded [and appropriate] action doled out to him, yet the bar owner who used these girls, and the parents of the girls (who must have known they were prostitutes) not similarly dealt with?

The law is the law, simple as that. It isnt the place of the press to dole out justice, and we can be sure that this whole thing would have played out in much fairer fashion if the press had not hounded for Glitter to be shot (for Paedophillia, not his shit albums).

I agree with all current child protection law, but I do have an idea for a new one. It should be illegal to mislead a man as to your age, when I saw that photo and realised the girl in it was only 15 I was shocked, how many guys out there are running a serious risk every week just because a little girl wants to grow up too fast?

Shouldn't we deal with these magazines that encourage this behaviour? Shouldn't we shoot the woman who recently designed a series of clothes for 11-17 year old girls emblazoned with words like Hussy and Slut?

I'm sure many will be quick to respond to this piece, lets just hope that girl doesn't come to try her luck with you next time you're drunk, a touch of make-up and a thong saying "juicy" can obviously add at least 4 years to a girls age.