Work is for suckers

Welcome to today's topic for debate, right up until the point I stop listening because you are wrong.

Today's issue is one I'm equally guilty of. It is often said that here in the UK we take less holiday, shorter lunch breaks and work longer hours than most other nations, and this is true, so why don't all major companies bring their factories over here for efficent production by British staff?

Well, there is no short answer, so take a deep breath and lets begin. First off, there is the issue of the generally slack work ethic in this country, ok we all come to work for long periods but overall, we spend most of our time doing the bare minimum and just focus on getting through the day so we can drink too much and have a fight. Work is dull, that is how you can tell you are at work. Thats the whole point.

Where I work, this is especially true, we do all we can to piss about and make the whole experience more interesting. Mike v.1.0 enjoys making up little games in his dept. to pass the time and prevent himself from commiting suicide.

For those of you with catarcts, the list above is a scoreboard, with points acheived for actions such as; Lying to a customer about something being out of stock, asking a customer if they would "fancy a bum?", making an animal noise or give them a cheeky wink with your hand doing the guns thing.

This isn't as bad as it gets, please enjoy this photo Mike took of me sneaking out of my back warehouse and wrapping my superior's car in cling film. I apologise for looking bad but I wasn't feeling my best;

Now, I am a head of department, and as such should know better. Truth be told however, we're all at it in our own special way.

Next up, We don't work all day because we enjoy it. We work because life in Britain is so bloody expensive. For those who don't know. We are taxed heavily on everything.the only thing thats free in England is all the air you see around me in the above photo, thats it.

Which brings me onto another reason our industry is on the decline, Tax. Tax is so high that companies just don't want to pay it, nor our wages which have to be equally high. In Korea one major car manufacturer found they had to reject one in every ten components off the Korean production line, but only 1 in 1000 British made ones weren't up to scratch. Yet its that much cheaper to make them over there that the cost is negligible.

We once had the Greatest Empire the world has ever known, if you are American this may come as a shock, but you haven't won every war ever, nor do you have to fight inspite of the incompetence of the British [as in just about every movie you spew out over here] and nor did you "save our ass" we we're just fine thanks. You saved France if anyone, and we had to go with to make sure you liberated the right country. As I was saying, the Greatest Empire in human history and now we can't even supply washing machine components, something is tragically wrong.

However, we're not bothered. We'd all earn more on benefits anyway. I know I would.

Photos courtesy of Mike v.1.0 and Munkus.net [A short history of Team Well-Safe]