Hello guys and dolls, I really did hope my first entry would be, you know, half way decent, but I just got off a stupid 13-hour flight and getting hit on by a senile Arab, so I'll take this opportunity to tell you exactly how incredibly crap it is.
If sitting on your ass for 13 hours trying to make sense of Vantage Point and eating melted teeth (they call it tapioca) sounds good, you're going to fucking love it because that's exactly what it is. And any chance at joining the mile-high club was lost when the guy next to me started watching Desperate Housewives. The only thing between me and suicide was buying out the sky mall, and I'm starting to regret getting the Kalloo baby fragrance.
Right now, I'm in Fendi Casa (furniture store) and it's exactly as pretentious as it sounds. Everyone wears Lacoste polos and carries a purse, which can only mean metrosexual uber-douches. I'm probably going to have to listen to House music for the next nine hours too.
Well, I'm off look for some German tourists to take advantage of. That usually cheers me up.
Bye then.
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