Plus the Germans have scores of their own to settle. Had they not been convinced into signing up for the Austrian Painter & Decorator Exchange Scheme of 1931, the whole world might have been spared a lot of hassle and hastily constructed walls. Lederhosen, alpenhorns, schnitzel- all stereotypes associated with Germans but actually belonging to the Austrians. Maybe a 5-0 humiliation for the strudel boys will just about make up for literally centuries of crap German lampooning on British TV...
Yet the German team are playing it cool. Joachim Lovespuds adjusts his Topman scarf pensively as he stares down the barrel of another press conference. Ballack passes the time with careful cross-stitch while from a cage suspended from the ceiling of their Tyrolean hotel, Schweinsteiger channels his natural aggression into composing angry haiku, ever-chastened by the rigid grammatical structures and feeble imagery of the German language.
I predict early Austrian resistance, followed by exhaustion, disillusionment and a gradual steamrollering by our lads. Crazy supernatural Alpine forces could gift the Ozzies an early goal but Deutsch efficiency will win through in the end.
My expert prediction: 3-1 to Germany.
For pre-match inspiration, let's look at an example of Germans taking something Swedish and making it much much better:
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