Tuesday 3 June 2008

Get paid to camp it up!

It's getting to the time of year when everyone's after a summer job...
Last summer, rather than learn Turkish and work in a warehouse, I decided to work on a campsite in France. Pretty much in the middle of nowhere, living in a garden shed, earning 6€ a day (about 12p), working with a German who spoke no English in a godforsaken region that Bismarck, Kaiser Wilhelm and Adolf H had done their best to wipe off the map. Despite the minor setbacks of rain, perennial boredom, the alcoholic handyman's attempts to sabotage everything and a complete lack of bars, scotch eggs or Cornish pasties I still managed to have some pretty random and fun experiences:

-playing poker with Dutch football hooligans and winning
-German bingo calling ( neunundsechzig!)
-beer racing with foul French lager
-partying with local chavs at the village fete
-climbing trees and nearly dying four times (saved by a Dutch commando)
-repetitive pedalo theft (à la Flintoff)
-teaching cricket to the French using a football and a stale baguette
-getting woken up by a donkey at 5am because its owner was "interfering" with it
-forming a folk trio with two German ladies for a brief time
-being mortally wounded on French dodgems with no seatbelts

Not so merde after all. Anyway, let us know about the coolest summer job you've ever had. Maybe you've served faggots and peas to the queen or polished Jimmy Saville's codpiece...let us know!

2 comments:

Dr Brainspiller said...

Hey, just thought I'd get back to you with my celebrity death predictions:

1. John McRuick? Fuck knows how you spell that, but, you know, the fat ginner from Channel 4 racing. He must be 2 burgers away from a heart attack by now.

2. Joan Rivers

3. Stephen Hawking

4. Sir Patrick Moore

5. Jackie Stallone

Ravi said...

Interesting selection there- here's my analysis:

1. McCririck (or whatever) is a good outside bet cos he's always so wound up and a lot of people want him dead.
2. Too much plastic surgery and many powerful enemies could lead to Joan's demise
3. No dice. Doctor's gave him 6 months to live 12 years ago I think. I might live to regret this but I reckon he's immortal.
4. A dark horse, might shock us by popping his clogs around xmas, thus giving the yuletide goose and bittersweet taste
5. Her taste for the occult should keep her alive for a few more years I'm afraid.

Game on- 6 months to go!